The Book of Isms: Part 6, 241-297

The latest installment of The Book of Isms takes us to the end of Volume Two.

If you’ve been following up to this point, you’re by now well-aware of the blatant sexism and random vulgarity, the adoration of drug culture and the criticism of pop culture. It’s armchair philosophy at its finest. Taken cumulatively, there’s a little something for everybody. Nobody is spared and everybody will be offended.

• America is where people go to become assimilated.
• The government pays people based on their race.
• They call me “D” “DM” “DMX” Thank you Mr. X.
• America is the land of the really expensive
• There is no place in religion for religious experience. IT’S FREE
• You need to take off your glasses and get on your dick-sucking lips.
• Bust out your cocksucker.
• Asians? Little brown fucking machines.
• Computers and Whiskey. What a name for a book.
• I didn’t want to punch him, so I drop-kicked him in the chest.
• I will, but I do.
• Writer’s block arises from thinking everything you do is stupid.
• Thank you for ruining my day.
• I haven’t decided whether or not I like you. Can I have your number?

The Book of Isms: Part 4, Nos. 121-200

The look on Skeleton’s face says it all.

What was I thinking!? I’m glad some thirteen years have passed since I had the absence of mind to write this ceaseless drivel. It remains true that some are still funny or occasionally insightful. There might even be some prescience to a few ideas…but I kinda doubt it.

Want to start at the beginning?

• Though I haven’t personally experienced such a thing myself, I’ve heard watching too much TeeVee will give you butt rot.
• “Put it in your mouth.”
• I think it’s safe to say that in this modern age, just about everyone gets pissed off when the Internet goes down.
• While I’m at it, fuck Bill Gates
• I’d give cooking show host Rachel Ray a 30 minute meal
• A Patty Wong has sucked a dong.
• The Super Adventures of John McLane
• I would love to see someone vomit on a televangelist.
• Garf is just another word for one ugly bitch
• All former Enron execs should have bottles of champagne opened up their ass for punishment.
• Who wouldn’t pay money to see Gallagher crush Bill O’Reilly’s head with a sledgehammer?
• I have only two words for George Carlin: Rock On
• More people have probably died for religion than lived for it.
• Hugh Hefner gets my respect.